I’m not sure how
to explain
to you
how to get
to where
I am

I cannot find a synonym
for love


In an attempt to be brief

here is a moment I felt truly alive:

when the wind-hurtled leaves convulsed

in the dirt and I caught the tang of turmoil in the air

as rain-soaked eyes and misty trees

all merged into one song.

forget the malleability of flesh

‘twas brave, the woman
who wandered up a winding path of
crispy leaves
toward a glowing distant peak.
and as her gaze
took in the lowering
of the sun she felt a shiver scuttle
up her spine, not
for fear of darkness or
of solitude,
but for the unrelenting cold that creeps
with dusk’s farewell
into her bones and lingers
long past dawn, a thorough chill
in which she steeps until-
the malleability of flesh, the stinging tingle
that accompanies heat-
she neglects to move at all,
and curls instead into a ball
at the foot of a quaking aspen tree,
where she sinks into
the wilderness;
forever alone and finally free.


Generous Love

You are not
my one true love.
We both know
there are many kinds of love
in this life, each
with its own truth
to tell. But yours reminds
the world of its capacity
for giving
and receiving,
it encourages me
to rest a moment
in the cupped hands
of the present, to bare
some soul and bask
in the heat
of mutual affection. It is remarkable
in its humility, which speaks
louder than any hubris
I have yet encountered and in its generosity,
which is the most genuine I know. I will not
tell you my love for you
eclipses all others, only that
my heart rings clear, reverberating indefinitely
across an inner
landscape that I only share
with you.

2014-07-03 19.03.22

chutes and ladders

Most days are breakfast
gulped, lunches packed, sunscreen
slathered, dinner served, lights
out routine-tame.

Some days every step is chutes
and ladders, conversations become
shouting matches, nothing
is where you left it, the dog
gets sprayed by a skunk right at
bed time and at 2am you find yourself still
doing laundry.

But there are also crystal
moments when the room is full of
music, when everyone agrees
the joke is funny, when the offers to help
outnumber the requests and an empty
lap becomes a willing pillow
for a sleepy head.

2013-07-20 21.06.40

Frog Noses

Mommy holds
my hand
very tight
asks something about a ‘prognosis’
makes me think of frog noses
I giggle, she squeezes, brows
furrowed. I bite my lip.

Later, licking swirly soft serve in a race
against the hot hot heat, she stares
over my shoulder
fist tucked
under her chin, her spoon
forgotten halfway to her mouth.

I want to tell her
she’s dripping on the table-
she hates when things are messy-
but I keep quiet, scared
of her sighs, of the silence
and of her empty eyes.